Are you being strong or just acting tough?


'if you live for people's acceptance you will die from their rejection'

Been thinking about this phenomenon being strong again because of an article in Psychology Today.
I am noticing these type of people that are acting tough and thinking that this is what being strong is all about. 
They hide their emotions, are very competitive (the need to prove themselves) and really think they’re invincible.

Maybe a bit cheeky of me to say this, but they’re wearing a mask and are becoming so good in hiding that you  believe they aren't having any problems at all. The vulnerability isn't anywhere near sight.


There are a few character traits that stand out when it comes to these type of people.

PRIDE

Here it is very obvious that they care a lot about what others think (of course they would never admit this). Therefor they have to prove themselves and their achievements is depending on others.  But it is all about being humble and a bit modest I guess to develop this mental strength and become ‘better’. Strong people DO ask for help and have no need to prove anything to anyone but themselves. There is no showing off in being strong. 

SUPPRESSING EMOTIONS

Of course there are proper moments for not showing emotions (on the short-term). For example, when you’re a doctor you can’t get carried away in your emotions while bringing bad news. Then it may be helpful to suppress your emotions. But ignoring them on the long-term, that isn't healthy. Being strong means that you are aware of emotions and feelings and that they influence your behavior. Listen to them and open up by sharing them. Then you can manage to control your emotions instead of the other way around. 

FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION

You’ll notice this when they are, again, very competitive. It is okay to strive for success but it is not realistic that you will succeed the first time. Failure is necessary in my opinion. That is what builds you and makes you stronger. I believe it is a part of the process toward a (long) journey of success. 

HIDE INSECURITIES

This acting tough attitude, what they’re doing is actually a scream of “look how great I am”. But in reality it is an exterior that has to compensate with the interior, the self-doubt and insecurity.
Strong people don’t cover up their weaknesses and brag about how good they are. Because they don't feel the need to impress someone. 

EXAGGERATE

A healthy amount of self-confidence is a okay! But tough people tend to give way too much, again to show this to the outer world. They don’t dose their energy and pay little attention to warning signs from their body. Because that is considered weak. 
Strong people are taking their time and acknowledge that hard work and patience is needed to reach a goal. This also won’t lead to big disappointments. 
You’ll also will notice that tough people will tolerate a great amount of pain and suffering. It is good to test your limits but why exaggerate. It is better to take in the pain but suffering shouldn't be an option. Stop treating your body like a machine.

I really hope people are opening up a bit more rather than acting tough. Because we are all beautiful just the way we are! No need to be hard on yourself and definitely not on others.

do you consider yourself as a strong person or still hiding?



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