Pictures by Xaviera
We all have our past. But not everybody deals with their past. And that is when it will affect your future.
You don't always think you have to deal with the past. Just put it away and it isn't there anymore right?
No. The more you bottle everything up, the bigger the chances are you'll reach a very low point in life.
Usually this will happen because of an incident. You lose someone very precious or you get fired. You name it.
When this happens, it is horrible, but completely normal and not the end of the world.
But it does feel like that. And nobody deserves to feel like that.
And that is why I would love to share a few tips to make a depression as a bearable as possible.
And eventually learning how to cope with it.
1. ASK FOR (PROFESSIONAL) HELP!Sorry for yelling. But I am so serious about this. Contact your doctor or a psychologist.
They can give you the professional help,whether you like it or not, that you really need. Because you simply don't see the light anymore. You're numb.
I know this is a big step, because it requires acceptance and acknowledgement that you are in a depression.
2. STAY IN TOUCH WITH YOUR LOVED ONESYou are probably in a state where you would rather lay in bed in a fetal position and shut down.
And only the idea of talking to even one person can be too much already. But it WILL make you feel better if you inform a few people, not too many, what you're going through.
The psychologist can only provide you with professional support, but you do need that shoulder and hug at the end of the day from those people that you love. They are your safe haven. And they will never ever judge the situation and state you're in.
3. EXERCISEWhen being in a depression, your brain stops making serotonin (the feel good hormone), endorphin (painkillers and euphoric feeling), dopamine and norepinephrine (motivation and reward feeling).
Well those are some feelings we really cannot live without right!? And because your mind and body is in stand by mode, you are missing out on all of those motes. It is a downward spiral you have to break. And this is the hardest step to make.
But here it goes, get moving. Do some exercises. But don't be to hard on yourself because you simply don't have the energy. You probably say to yourself when thinking about exercising, I must go to the gym. Choose your options, for example do some exercises at home, something you (usually) enjoy. Maybe dancing? And NO, not for an hour, but 10 minutes or even less! Because you're tired. But these exercises will activate those motes. And that is the goal!
4. AVOID PEOPLE THAT DON'T UNDERSTAND YOUSome people just simply cannot understand that you are going through all of this. They think it is all between the ears or it is some kind of switch you can turn off.
You don't need that. You need people that support you, listen to you and don't judge you. Because this isn't the person you want to be and you are working your ass of to feel happy again. You can tell them what they can do for you and they will be there in an instant believe me. If not, then it is not meant to be. So focus on those who give you that unconditional love. Those are the ones you can go into war with and win.
5. FIND POSITIVE DISTRACTIONSIt is really easy to choose a self destructive method as a distraction because you feel like shit already. Like alcohol, drug, shopping, eating or even automutilation. Automutilation is not a scream for attention. It simply means that your mind is full! You need to release all those tensions and you are choosing to hurt yourself because you are in such an intense amount of pain already. BUT! It will only release the emotion at that moment not the problem. You even feel much worse when your tension is coming back. The downward spiral again.
So find distractions that give you positive feelings. For example, sing, dance, meditate or take a nice walk outside. It will also give you a better feeling about yourself.
6. CONTINUE WRITING & TALKINGThis is something you have to make a habit of. Writing will give you insight about your thoughts. You need to have that balance between writing and the positive distractions. And with the help of a psychologist, that will tell you how to write, you will find so much more peace and hope again. It is all worth it. And those feelings were lost and buried under many gloomy and sad thoughts.
So keep writing and talking and don't be to hard on yourself. It sucks so bad but in the end it is really worth it. Give it time. YOU are worth it.